A Mother's love (my mom)

It's funny to think back on myself prepping for when I would go into labor. My husband and mother in law were to be by my side since everyone else was too far away and couldn't take the time off to just wait it out until my body was ready to have her. My mother and I had conversations about being upset she wouldn't be around. It was a toss up in my head as to if it would be helpful or not... I had no clue. Sometimes we take things too personally with one another and get frustrated, would that happen as I was stressed and in labor? Would I be touchy? I had no idea. But it was sad to think that my mother wouldn't be there in such a crazy time. And it killed me to think about how my new born baby wouldn't have the welcome to this world with family and friends surrounding us as so many other babies got. It hurt my heart. And it still does, because we didn't get that. She deserved to be surrounded by loved ones gazing at her fighting to hold her first.

But I must say, having my mother on the first flight out and with us at the hospital was priceless. I think in this time, no matter how old we are, there are times when you just "need your mommy". This was one of those times. And although she had no idea what I was feeling or going through, i knew she hurt with me. I knew that she loved me and wanted amazing things for me... and this was far from what was in mind!

She tried to hug me when I needed it, and give me space as well. She helped us busy our minds, and she tried to help me breath through the pain at one point too. You know it's funny, I prayed many night that Harlow would connect us deeper than we ever had been. I felt in my heart that I needed a little bit more... and now in looking at the whole picture, she did. I was very thankful that my mother was by my side when I gave birth. I am thankful we were all there in the hospital together and that she could see a different side of my husband than she'd been able to see before. I will continue to be thankful that we can share the memories of Harlow -happy and sad tears- together forever.

I know a mother's love, and that is why she was out here as fast as she could be. And I hope that she knows that it meant the world. No matter how much we grow up, we still can cherish these moments of need.

Thanks Mom.